Prayer to Follow Jesus More Closely

Jesus, I have known about You for a long time. I am asking to know You. I confess how easily I settle for admiration instead of imitation. I like Your teachings on love until loving becomes costly. I admire Your courage until courage is required of me. I am moved by Your sacrifice as long as it asks nothing of my own comfort. Call me further. As You called fishermen from their nets, call me from whatever small, safe thing I have made into my security. I am more afraid of staying shallow than of going deep, and that is Your doing. Teach me Your habits: how You withdrew to pray, how You noticed the one everyone stepped around, how You spoke hard truths to powerful people and gentle truths to broken ones. Let these stop being stories and become instincts. I do not know where this following will lead. I only know it leads through You. Where You go, I want to go. What You love, I want to learn to love. Make me Yours, wholly and without reserve. Amen.